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Thursday, December 9th, 2004
10:43 pm - Leading Me On
Caught in a game,
But you let me out,
Were you feeling shame,
That you were leading me on.
What is my name,
I seem to forget,
I don't want this fame,
So stop leading me on.

You had to talk,
How did it go?
Cause now you walk,
Felt bad for leading me on?
Cause he's the one,
I was just your escape,
For having fun,
You were just leading me on.

He's alive and knows the whole,
She's so lost, lacking control.

I'm just the pawn, when I came along,
Cruel intentions had tainted her soul.
She moves me where I can't come up for air,
I've got to break away from her hold.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Friday, October 22nd, 2004
5:01 pm - Everything You Do Is Music To My Ears
Play a note, get it wrong,
It's still music to me.
Any sound that you may utter
Is crafted so beautifully.

I'll help you hear it out,
Maybe even help you to see,
That if you forget the whole song,
I'll still wait patiently.

But whatever you decide to do,
And whatever road life takes you through,
Just know that I could spend the rest of my life
Listening to the same song with you.

It's music to my ears.

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Saturday, October 16th, 2004
11:26 am
I cheated death as a child.

Does that make me special?
Or does that make me a bad person?

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Friday, September 17th, 2004
8:18 pm
Last night, I had a dream
You were there in all your splendor
All your glory that made me melt
Your smile beaming, it had me entanced
You handed me a gun
Told me to blow you away
I thought you were crazy
But your smile was so trusting
I put the gun to your head
Pulled the trigger
Down you fell
With the smile still upon your face
Is this what you wanted
To be set free
To leave me feeling guilty
This eternal chalk line
Surrounding you, etched in my mind
Reminding me of how I let you down
I wish I could bring you back to life.....

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Saturday, September 4th, 2004
11:10 am - Smile
If only you would have stopped complaining
And took the time to fucking smile....

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Monday, August 23rd, 2004
9:11 pm - I Promise
Rode home in silence,
Never felt so out of place,
Turn the radio up,
Pretend we're alone in this space.

I could feel the tension burning,
Tingling and taunting my skin,
I wanted to say something comforting,
But I didn't know where to begin.

I'll take all your suffering,
Direct it towards myself,
Just so you can feel better,
I'll put myself through hell.

Don't worry about hurting me,
Don't worry about how I feel,
As long as I know this is what you want,
Eventually I'll start to heal.

I could tell myself I hate you,
But I'll know that it's a lie,
So go home and get some sleep,
Because I promise, this isn't goodbye.

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Thursday, August 5th, 2004
11:39 pm - Keep Raining
She looked so cute dancing in the rain
Spinning and laughing
Arms gracefully sweeping through the air
I want that image to burn in my mind
Scar and remain forever
Her smile, the look in her eyes
Each tiny rain drop falling against her flesh
Reflected by the light
Revealing her to be the diamond she truly is
This precious gem for my eyes to see
Sets a spark inside
And suddenly I feel alive
This is what you do to me

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Friday, July 23rd, 2004
3:40 pm - What Are You Thinking?
Have I made a mistake? Did I cause a lot of pain? Acted on instinct alone, never stopped to think. I knew I should have stopped, but it felt too good inside. Felt love, felt at peace, felt like the world revolved around us. I gazed into your eyes, saw endless miles of affection, and lost myself in the moment. Nothing else in the world mattered to me. You're so beautiful, washed away all my troubles and worries. All that I sensed was every movement you made. Floating right above me, so mesmerizing. Lean in for a kiss, really felt a rush of energy. Nothing more special than this passionate connection. I didn't want to stop. I didn't want to go. But it's funny how a simple thought can complicate the world. A simple thought can creep in and tear apart the universe.

What are you thinking?

I need to know.

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Thursday, June 17th, 2004
10:57 pm - Short And Simple Attack (I'm Not Mad, Just Making A Point)
Life is short,
But it's the most time you'll ever have,
Think about that as you waste your minutes,
Waiting for an answer to come to you,
Nothing comes that easily,
Hopefully you'll figure that out soon,
I won't sit around and sulk,
Wasting my lifetime,
Waiting for you.

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Thursday, June 3rd, 2004
11:32 pm - Move Along
I'm just a body
Lying in the street,
Walk all over me,
You'll move along
When there's nothing left to see,
Lying face down on the concrete,
Staying solitary never felt so sweet,
The sun radiates down,
Kissing the back of my neck with its heat.

The street and I are discrete,
But somehow we greet,
I'm free to move on,
But this is where I like to meet,
Where I was shot down with my dreams,
No shops around can comfort me,
I'll always have my spot,
Where you knocked me off my feet.

So move along now,
There's nothing left to see,
The show's over,
I only wish it revolved more around me.

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Thursday, May 20th, 2004
12:02 pm - Harmony
Harmonize with the wrong,
Hear her call out in vain,
Unite, embrace, but not in hate,
Feel the weight shift from beneath me,
Destiny can come even during the rain.

Adjust this dusty aperture, and focus on a new day.

Lionize the object of imperfection,
Take her to a whole new state,
Capsize, and rise up to the bottom,
When your way seems confused,
It's best to relate.

Relate to all your troubles, it's the easiest escape.

Unsettled inside your head,
Fall down to your knees,
When the wind can't choose a direction,
Just hold ground,
And enjoy the breeze.

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Friday, May 14th, 2004
2:05 pm - We Grow?
It's beyond my control,
This image I have has nothing to hold,
You look at me now,
See me clear as day,
Not knowing that something changed along the way,
Can't understand,
That I haven't had these thoughts all along,
Something must have made me strong,
We spend all our lives trying to know,
But we never took the time to watch ourselves grow.
Slipped right beneath me,
When did this occur?
We forget that we were once the youth of the world.
It's beyond my perception,
Trying to form this difficult conception,
Taste of morning dew in my head,
This new thought that rises with the day,
For some reason in my mind,
I've always been the same size,
I don't recall ever being so dependent,
Maybe we'd understand if we were more willing to know,
If we only took the time to watch ourselves grow.

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Tuesday, April 20th, 2004
9:26 pm - White on Ebony
What's not to say
What we can't do?
Give me a sign
And I'll follow through.
With thoughts so deep
And words so true,
Who would've thought I'd fall for you?

What's right and wrong?
We fail to see.
Mix things up
What you disapprove
Feels right to me.
Who would've thought contrasting could feel so free?

It's white on ebony.

Paint a picture, black and white,
It's all the same to me.
Coincide, we'll fall together
If it happens to fall on me.

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Monday, April 12th, 2004
3:08 pm - Not What You See
If nothing in the world had a meaning,
Life's little pleasures,
Would be full of pain.
If beauty had no appeal,
You'd be just another face,
Left with a stain.

No reason to cry or feel left out,
We're all left alone with nothing to condole.
Your actions are meaningless, words turn to dust,
Cut away from the world, feel your heart rust.

Throwing out a cry for help,
Has no effect when put forth with no emotion.
Emotions are confused.
Check the writing on the wall,
And the underlying structure.
If the hand is quicker than the eye,
Just how reliable is what we see on the surface?

If everything was "What you see is what you get."
We'd be living blindly.

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Monday, March 29th, 2004
9:15 pm - Thought Process Of The Phlegmatic Soul
Pass over me,
Don't hear what I say,
I speak the truth and reason,
But you only see things your way.
I praise you for your tenacity,
Bless you for your conviction,
But you're rushing in to danger,
Trust my jurisdiction.
But I'm the fool for thinking,
It's nonsensical to be bright,
Judge my thoughts and knowings,
Who cares if I was right?
As long as you have your way,
It doesn't matter the outcome,
Frozen to the outside world,
Inside is nothing but numb.
Insensitive to reason,
Closed to an open mind,
Comatose to caring,
Blunt and going blind.
Unconscious to all things sophic,
Torpid, cold, and dry,
Nothing can shine from this insenient body,
The life and energy is immobilized.

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Friday, March 12th, 2004
6:24 pm - The Insanity Caused By Music 1004
The ceiling is dark,
Spinning and reflecting,
The day was full of encounters.
You caught a glimpse,
Maybe too many,
She can see inside me.
I look away in fear,
Trapped inside your eye,
My projected prison.
Dry your eyes,
Fall out in a tear,
Embrace me, the foolish child.
Shy away into the walls,
Keep the room from falling down,
Support this connection between us.
I'd love to see things your way,
See where I fall in your thoughts,
If I fall anywhere at all.
Catch more than just a glimpse,
I'll find a way out of your eye,
And into your heart.

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Friday, March 5th, 2004
9:27 pm - DIY Attitude
Put me in a box,
Block all that I wish to see,
Force me to do your labor,
Must be nice to live for free.
Long and tiring hours,
Turning into days,
Sleep deprived and irritable,
My life is one big craze.
But still, I'm forced along,
I never get a break,
I never hear the end of it,
If I make but one mistake.
Your face may be old,
Doesn't mean wisdom comes with that mask,
If you think you could have done better,
Then why'd you have to ask?
That's what I thought,
Go fuck yourself.

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Monday, March 1st, 2004
9:13 pm - Dear Friend
Stop and look around.
Take a good look at everyone that you love,
Because in the blink of an eye,
They could all be gone.
Reality hits hard when it's making a point,
Sharp like a spear that just tears through your heart.
Friends and family alike all fade away,
Portraits ripped in half,
It's only now that you think about giving them the time of day.
Let them know that you care.
Let them know how you feel.
Treat everyday alive,
As a really big deal.
Don't wait for it to get late,
That's taking too much of a risk.
It's a shocking realization when you have to say,
"Goodbye, dear friend. You will be missed."

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Sunday, February 29th, 2004
10:04 pm - Beautiful Victim Of Sobriety
She never drank to forget her pain.
Always pushed it away,
Smiled and faked her day.
Never found anyone to confide in,
Never had the urge to dive in.
Indulge herself so she can forget.
She didn't turn to the bottle.
And like the bottle's contents,
She kept it all locked inside.
Nothing will stay sweet forever.
The finest of seeds will go bad.
Staying sober and calm
Can sometimes be
As destructive as being drunk and wreckless.
Take a sip every now and then,
You don't want life to be pointless.
Wasted and withered because of abstinence,
A beautiful victim of sobriety.

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Thursday, February 26th, 2004
4:25 pm - Mechanical Herds
Always on the go,
I want to follow, but I have ways of my own.
Here, surrounded by metal, we're supposed to feel safe.
Feed off what they say.
Herd in the directions they want.
Aren't we too old to be spoon fed?
Never can find a straight path.
Maybe it's a reminder of how life is never a straight line.
Still, I snap back.
Still strapped in.
Still moseying along.
But still, I've gotten nowhere.
I look around to see all these other faces.
They don't feel the same.
They're still trapped in this mechanical herd.

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